*Sign of attraction - - แรงดึงดูดใจ

I have been keeping record quite a while and therefore could not help remain curious WHY, among those who come and go, most guys I met in the past fall into the same category - *shopping* around. Married guys. With kids. Occupied ones. Arrogant and gorgeous, yet playing around guys. Good-looking ones with double/triple/or more dating. New faces, same story.

Why so?

Now I really wonder if it is parts of my body language, words of mine in conversations, or noticeable signs that I have unintentionally delivered to ones I talked to? Why have I attracted such guys? Don't I look serious enough? Do I look like a girl who just love to play around and have fun?

Is it me who mistakenly draw attentions or *something* would like to give me lessons, strengthen my horizons, or basically send ones merely to kill my time until it is the right time for *the one*??

I always believe that I have been behaving well as being raised up in this warm, full of love family. My parents always support my academic path along the way and I value the importance of education and lifetime learning. I thus believe that I am well educated to an extent to justify what is right and wrong. Additionally, I was raised, taught and learned from family and experiences in a sense that living with good thoughts would bring along good people and happenings. Although I pursued my Master's in the U.S. and have been consuming lots of American as well as other western entertainment, when it comes to manners towards other genders and the so-called sensitive sexual issues, I am open to an extent, yet at the same time relatively conservative.

After experiencing quite a number of such kind of guys, I came up with this rule: I am NOT into good-looking guys, especially those who are super self-centered and perceived not to lose any games. The reason behind is that I do not want to be the guys' pet, stupidly fighting with all the girls in town and ending up with nothing but blaming on my own fool. My experiences taught me that those *gorgeous look* comes with a perspective. Such guys have been getting whatever they want all the way through and therefore confident enough that they can win every game. No offense. Whether my perception is correct or not does not really matter, I just stay away to make sure I will not involve any of such unpleasant situations. I do not want to hear of anyone commenting on me as oh that girl well she is bugging me, or oh you know she is desperately chasing me around and I am so annoyed... blah blah blah...

Well, what I can complain. As some said, the more you dislike such and such, the more possibility such and such come to you.

AND I JUST FINISHED *ANOTHER* CASE OF SUCH -"-


Anyway, only God knows why I have stuck in this undesirable maze. What I can do is to live my life according to my beliefs and values, to stay as far as possible away to such inauspicious circumstances. Lastly, keep my fingers crossed until *something" up there considers it is the time to hand me *the one*. [blink blink]


......

UPDATE :: 06-12-08, 12:04am

Well well well, now I AM confused. As written above "I just finished *another* case of such", now I must confess that I am not really sure of that. Whether finish or not finish yet is one thing, whether it is correctly categorized *the case* of *such* is another! Now I do not know where I am in the case, or whether it is the case. Only time will tell. Let's see how the story goes...

Anyway, what I am sure right now is that the rule is still valid - I am NOT into good-looking guys, especially those who are super self-centered and perceived not to lose any games. BUT the more you dislike such and such, the more possibility such and such come to you. Well well well, I'd better stop here, before getting even more confused!!